Sui Javo

A fine grey powder billowed skyward from the asphalt before taking the shape of the wind and dissipating into nothing. The cinder blocks tests the results of falling from such great heights. Like an egg drop gone horribly wrong, the event begins. The first contestant walks to the ledge holding cinder block stuffed full of tomatoes and tosses it in an arc with a few tomatoes escaping before implanting in the parking lot below. The cinder block reaches the ground delivering its payload of lycopene to the black top. The concrete splinters a fragment off of the corner allowing the tomatoes to ooze out like some sadistic pasta sauce.



The next contestant steps forward with a wooden box of 1"x2" boards stuffed with pickled beets in one side and 2 4"x4" blocks. The drop is meticulous and the box lands on the wood blocks firing the pickled beets airborne into the nearby splash zone. The ruddy purple strikes near the tomato remains in a spray pattern as if spewed from the mouth of some tomato beast that had fallen to earth. Contestant two walks away pleased with the effect.



Contestant three walks to the ladder rungs peeking over the top of the building's edge and ties the ends of a water balloon slingshot to each before loading the funnel with a leftover order of Chicken Tikka from Fast Fresh Indian. In one smooth motion, she pulls the funnel back tightening the elastic and quickly angles the shot downward firing before any can drip onto the building. An explosion of curry and chicken strike at an angle next to the previous two contestants spraying over top of the other two stains like a sunburst.



The judge nods in approval as contestant 3 steps back rejoining the line of contestants just as contestant four pulls a bag of limes out strapping them to his chest before sprinting and leaping off the edge of the building. The other contestants run to the edge, but can only stop and watch as the body tumbles 6 stories to the parking lot below. The body strikes the ground just beyond the tomatoes firing various streams of green lime pulp and rind in all directions. The body lies still momentarily before pressing against the ground in a push up and rising to his feet.



Shaking off the initial shock, he begins to sprint towards the gate before the guard stops him and knocks him flat with a clothes line. The judge grabs the radio from his belt and barks orders at the guard. In response, the other contestants watch as the guard smashes his flashlight over number four's head and drags the limp body into the guard house.

"Number 3. You are the winner. Now everyone dance!" The judge announces as if nothing happened. Looking downward to the parking lot she now sees the guard and contestant number four outside of the guard house dancing like they were in a dance club. The two contestants are doing an old fashioned swim dance and the judge is breaking down with the pony when she looks down and sees a trophy at her feet.

Picking it up she reads the inscription: "Lisa Weinstand, Winner of Food Stai.. traffic today on the 308 is backed up a bit due to an overturned fruit stand tipping into the exit lane near Randolph."

Lisa awakes to her radio alarm with a styrofoam container lying next to her on her bed. She remembers getting back at near to 2am the night before and ordering late night Indian food. She must have fallen asleep while eating and had a stream of yellow stain down her shirt and on her sheets. Turning 30 wasn't supposed to be like this, she tells herself before killing the alarm clock and rolling over again.